Hey kids! You can be all about your Miley Cyrus twerking and your One Dimension, but want to know what we were all about in the 70’s? This pretty much sums it up…
This model kit combines two of my favorite things: cyborgs and simians. And you don’t even need any frickin’ glue! Pure genius is what this is. Steve Austin was the man in the late 70’s, taking out any man or beast that made the mistake of getting in his way.
Just look at the hidden glory in this kit — “removable panels to display Bionic mechanisms!!” Sweet! The side panel also displays another model kit where the Bionic Man is bursting through a steel door, taking out the entire surrounding stone wall in the process. There is actually another model in this series, where our hero is wrestling an alligator. That’s right.
A huge gorilla is no match for Steve Austin, as proven in this documentary.(Is that how you spell “Equitorial?”)
This particular kit has never been put together, but some kid started to paint the pieces. The fact that he painted the gorilla white rather than black, takes things to a whole new level.
Gentlemen, I can rebuild him. I have the technology. I have the capability to build the world’s first bionic man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster. — and fighting a mythical white ape. It will be glorious.